


My heart is yours

by mainlysushi



Series: Atypical Romance [5]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Historical, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-26
Updated: 2019-07-09
Packaged: 2019-07-17 20:01:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 2,696
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16102781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mainlysushi/pseuds/mainlysushi
Summary: He knew it was futile; but he loved him nonetheless.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Falling in love with someone beneath your station was deeply frowned upon; it just wasn’t acceptable at all. Thus Seungcheol kept his blossoming feelings to himself, burying it deep within the confines of his heart, and never ever uttering a single word about it.
> 
> Yet the flowers continued to bloom despite the cold winter; he then knew his time was running out.

A strong gust of wind breezed through him, his robes billowing at its force. He closed his eyes so the dust wouldn’t blind him. He felt the wind’s touch; the cold caress numbing him. The leaves rustled, shaking and quaking on the branches whilst some fell onto the ground; its sounds strangely comforting.

He then slowly opened his eyes. His gaze instantly going towards the peach trees. There were only a few leaves left on its branches, a clear indication of the coming winter. A heavy sadness settled over him with the realization of the changing seasons. He missed the autumn festival for the very first time.

He had been in bed for weeks, sick to his bones. He was coughing excessively and fighting a fever from time to time. He simply had no choice but to miss his favorite festival.

A grim expression then appeared on his beautiful face. With the way things were going, the autumn festival wouldn’t be the only festival he’d be missing.

“Young master Seungcheol!” he then heard Jeonghan, his attendant and best friend, exclaim from behind him. He turned around and saw a panicked expression on his face. He smiled apologetically at the other.

“Hello Jeonghan,” he greeted. “A lovely day, isn’t it?”

Jeonghan frowned at Seungcheol’s carefree behavior. “You’re still not well, young master,” he scolded. “You shouldn’t have left your room. It’s cold outside and you just recovered from another fever. The doctor advised you to be on bed rest. You shouldn’t be pushing yourself like this,” he continued, his panic quickly changing into worry. He stared anxiously at his young master. “What if your condition worsens?”

Seungcheol gratefully smiled at his attendant’s concern. He walked towards the latter and squeezed his shoulder. “I will return to my room once I have talked to my father, Jeonghan,” he told him, eyes serious. “It’s a matter I must personally do and settle quickly.”

The attendant could only nod obediently at his plea.

He smiled appreciatively at his longtime friend. They both knew what his words entailed.

Without another word, Seungcheol then made his way towards his father’s quarters, his steps haste. He needed to speak with the lord as soon as possible because time was regrettably not on his side.


	2. Chapter 2

The sun hung high above the blue sky, the white clouds featherlike in the wide blue expanse; the harsh winter had gradually faded into a greener and brighter spring. The ice had melted and gave way to blossoming flowers. A breeze passed through the trees, ruffling its already new set of leaves. There was even a butterfly finally coming out of its cocoon, its wings a nice shade of blue and yellow. Another season has passed and another season has come, a new cycle has already begun.

A five-year-old Seungcheol stared, wide-eyed and quite intrigued at the wonders of nature around him. He had learned from his tutor the different seasons and knew that spring usually meant a beginning of some sort.

For the plants it was regrowth; a time for their fallen leaves to be replaced by news and their flowers to bloom again.

For people, however, it could differ. The symbolism was quite complicated; his tutor had explained. He mentioned that when something has begun, something else have ended. That was the way things were naturally; beginnings meant endings and endings meant beginnings. His tutor didn’t explain any further though, letting little Seungcheol ponder on a deeper meaning for himself. The elder knew their young master would surely come up with something remarkable.

Seungcheol then heard the distinctive sound of music. Curiosity piqued, he followed the sounds into the gardens. As he passed by the peach trees, he then noticed a little child in a blue hanbok dancing near the lake. He stopped, hiding behind the trees, not wanting to gain much attention to his presence.

The little child had small eyes and chubby cheeks – honestly cute – yet his movements were powerful and strong. It seemed like he was dancing the hallyangmu which had grown popular in their land.

The young lord then continued to watch, fairly intrigued and enraptured.


	3. Chapter 3

It had become habit of some sort. Every afternoon, just after his lessons and before dinner time, Seungcheol would walk through the winding paths of their vast garden and come sit by the peach trees, usually with a book in hand. He’d leisurely read whilst listening to the melodious music, quite content with keeping to himself. The young lord would pause every after a paragraph or two, just wanting to take a glimpse of his friend’s improvements. ‘Friend’ was such a weird endearment, he mused. The little dancer was honestly far from being his friend or an acquaintance. Seungcheol hardly knew the other. He doesn’t even know his name even after all the days he’d watched over his practice. He wanted to – both to know his name and be friends – yet the young lord also knew his title could get a bit intimidating. He was, after all, the heir to his father’s position.

So Seungcheol just sat, quiet and content, with his book and watched him from afar.

 

**

One afternoon, the little dancer was nowhere to be seen. Feeling a tad disappointed, the young lord daintily sat down beneath his - yes, _his_ since he had claimed the spot from that fateful day - peach tree and opened his book with a sigh. He had decided to finally approach the little dancer yet it seemed like fate wasn’t on his side.

He read the writings, his mind unfocused. “Where is he?” He huffed, worry settling at the pits of his stomach.

“Are you looking for me?” someone suddenly said from behind him. Seungcheol jumped, surprised at the unexpected voice. He turned his head and was face to face, just mere inches away from amused eyes and chubby cheeks he had only seen from afar. The little lord felt his face flush beet red. Ironically, the voice belonged to the person he was looking for.

He cleared his throat, trying desperately to hide his embarrassment. He gazed at the beautiful dark brown orbs staring back at him. He was left breathless by its depth. Getting more embarrassed, he looked away from the other.

“What are you talking about?” he feigned, his chin slightly turning upward. “I was just thinking where my friend was.”

The little dancer simply hummed a response. He stared at him, small eyes squinting inquisitively. He then grinned at Seungcheol and extended a hand towards him. “I’m Kwon Soonyoung,” he said, introducing himself. “It’s about time we get acquainted, don’t you think young master?” he said. “You have been watching me practice for days now after all,” he added, eyes twinkling even more.

He didn’t even know it was possible – Seungcheol became red like a tomato because of embarrassment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a while ///u\\\\\\\\)


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tryna be productive so hey hi ^^

Kwon Soonyoung – that was his name. He’s the nephew of his mother’s attendant. He was always visiting his aunt and had somehow gained affection from Seungcheol’s mother. He’s now under the wings of Lady Choi, training to be one of the performers in the theatre his mother usually sponsored.

He’s energetic – very hyperactive and playful honestly. Yet he’s serious when it comes to dancing, to performing. And maybe that’s why his mother had taken a liking to him. He was passionate, and definitely hardworking.

Now that they’re friends – yes, he could now confidently state that they are – Seungcheol would always watch him practice in the gardens after his lectures. Once Soonyoung was satisfied with his practice, he would lie beside him and would listen to Seungcheol read his book. Other times they would talk about the people in the Choi household, gossiping like old ladies about the many happenings within the walls of the residence.

It was a budding friendship, honestly. They were growing closer by the day and Seungcheol just knew the other would become an important person in his life.

He stared at Soonyoung closely. The other was practicing a different step his elder had just taught him. There was slight pout on his lips as he still couldn’t execute the move properly. Seungcheol could feel the frustration bubbling from the younger.

He shook his head and smiled, a fond expression forming on his face. He put down his book and stood up.

“Soonyoung-ah,” he called out to his friend. The other still continued, seemingly not hearing his voice. Seungcheol walked closer and laid a hand on the younger’s shoulder.

The latter jumped in surprised and turned to him with wide eyes. Seungcheol smiled even wider. “Let’s take a walk,” he told him. “Taking a break might help,” he suggested.

Soonyoung’s petite shoulders slumped. “It’s just way too hard!” he whined, lips slightly pouting. Seungcheol chuckled and grabbed for the other’s hand. He gave it a gentle squeeze and smiled reassuringly at Soonyoung.

“You can do it,” he said, smiling even wider. “I know you can!” he assured.

The younger finally smiled. He nodded his head and held Seungcheol’s hand tighter.

“Let’s go to mama Kim!” he then said, smile turning into a grin. “She might give us some rice cake if we both pester her!”

Seungcheol just laughed and let the younger pull him towards out of the gardens.

Their friendship might be fresh and new but somehow, Seungcheol knew Soonyoung would be an important part of his life. He just didn’t realize how important the other would be.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Double update yes? //_\\\\\\)

It had been a tiring day for Seungcheol. He had just come back after a month of travelling to the Southern lands when his father had called for him. He hadn’t even gotten off of his mount when Yougnbae, his father’s adviser, had beckoned for him to follow.

Seeing as it is an urgent matter, Seungcheol unmounted from his horse and hurried after the elder.

What greeted him when he arrived at his father’s quarters seriously stunned him. Anxiousness was immediately replaced with anger yet he kept it all inside. He smiled politely at the people inside the room and sat on his designated seat.

As the servants poured them freshly brewed tea and served them cakes, Seungcheol reeled in his emotions and masked his expressions. He was Choi Seungcheol after all, heir-apparent to the man sitting across from him. It would do him no good to let these people know what he’s truly thinking.

 

**

Seungcheol was sitting under the peach trees and watching the clouds pass by when he heard soft footsteps approach him. He didn’t need to turn his head to know who it was. They had spent almost their entire lives together after all – he’d know it _especially_ because it’s him.

The person sat beside him. Seungcheol glanced the other and briefly smiled. Soonyoung smiled back at him.

“I see you’ve come back, little lord,” the younger said, smiling at him teasingly. Seungcheol huffed and glared at him. “Don’t call me that,” he told the other. “I hate it whenever you call me that,” he added, pouting a little.

Soonyoung laughed and leaned his arm on his knees. “That’s who you are, Cheol-ah,” he said, gaze soft and understanding. “You’ll always be the young master, the next lord Choi,” he furthered. “You won’t be able to run away from that.”

The young lord turned to his friend, frowning. “Can’t I just be Seungcheol?” he asked. Soonyoung smiled gently.

“You can be just Seungcheol with me,” he said. “You will always be just Seungcheol for me.”

When Soonyoung gave him a brief hug, that was when Seungcheol realized _why_ he truly was devastated. The younger had already told him so.

He’s just Seungcheol.

 _Just_ Seungcheol for him.

 _To_ him, To Soonyoung, he was just Seungcheol.

He was just a friend and nothing _more_ – and that realization alone was a lot harder to swallow than his impending marriage.


	6. Chapter 6

The first time he had seen the younger, he was already enraptured. As they spend more time together, growing closer and closer as each season pass, his affections for Soonyoung had slowly and eventually blossomed into something more than he had expected.

The way his cheeks puff whenever he smiles, the way his eyes disappears whenever he laughs, the way his lips jut into a pout whenever he concentrates, the way his fingers play the gagangmyun, the way his body gracefully execute each movement – just each and every little thing about Soonyoung had enraptured Seungcheol's eyes and heart. The dancer had had him wholly without him knowing.

In hindsight, it was plainly obvious. Who was the first person he’d want to see when he opens his eyes? Soonyoung. Who was the first person he could freely laugh with? Soonyoung. Who was the person who could make him smile the brightest? Soonyoung. Who was the person he always wanted to share his triumphs? Soonyoung. Who was the person he always thinks about when he’s in conquest? Soonyoung. Who was the first person he rushes to once he comes home from an expedition? Soonyoung. Who was the person he most wanted to please? Soonyoung? Who was the first person he’d get a souvenir for? Soonyoung. Who was the person he wanted to spend time with? Soonyoung.

Soonyoung! Soonyoung! Soonyoung! His heart couldn’t stop shouting out his name. The answer was right in front of his eyes – it was all plain and simple for him to see yet he didn’t.

He should have realized it sooner. He was well-read in poetry and novels. Scholars had written the portrayal of love so perfectly and vividly; there were absolutely numerous signs of his growing feelings, yet Seungcheol had remained blissfully unaware _for years_.

The young lord shook his head in silent lamentation. Even if he had realized his feelings sooner, it was futile. Their future was already set in stone even before they were born.

A wry smile stretched across his lips. He was Choi Seungcheol – son of the city lord of Yongnam. He was the _heir_ to his father’s seat. He was expected to do a lot of things. Great things in fact!

Regrettably, love was not one of them.


	7. Chapter 7

It started with a harmless fever.

Seungcheol was in the North, in the midst of an expedition, when his body suddenly went weak. He had unexpectedly collapsed in the middle of a meeting with a city lord and was rushed back to his dwellings.

Drenched in a cold sweat, his entire body felt like it was lying on pins and needles. He was running a high fever, his muscles in extreme pain, his throat uncomfortably sore, and he was coughing like mad; he even felt King Yama's call whilst he was delirious. The doctor deduced he had contracted influenza.

With no other choice, he and his men went back to the city of Yongnam for him recuperate.

Seungcheol recovered soon enough. As the young master of a city lord, he had been given expensive medicine and elixirs in order for him to regain his strength. With his health back in shape, he started going back to his duties as heir. His father still refused to let him travel though, afraid his body was still too weak. But he was allowed to roam around the city's domain. Soonyoung usually accompanied him during his ventures.

Then after a few weeks, he started getting sick again.

He thought it was merely because of the weather - it was nearing winter after all - yet his illness seemed to be getting worse by the day.

The youth full of vigor had become weak and feeble. His complexion became sickly and pale in contrast to his previous flushed and red cheeks; even his strong countenance had become frail, his fierce and lively gaze turning dull and worn-out.

His health had begun deteriorating.

 

**

The day he turned eighteen, his father had withdrawn his engagement.

On the same day, Soonyoung told him he was in love with a writer.

Also on the same day, Seungcheol coughed up blood for the first time. Amidst the vicious red, a striking yellow then caught his eye.

He reached out for it and carefully placed it in his palm. His heart then sunk when he realized what it was.

It was a bloody petal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I guess y'all know what kind of story this is now, right? ///_\\\\\\\\)

**Author's Note:**

> I know posting this whilst my other sooncheol (our dawn is hotter than day) is still ongoing is absurd but I wanted to make it up to you guys so.... TADA! ;u;  
> I've had this one sitting in my drafts far longer than odihtd tbh and even though it's also unfinished, I wanted to write about this one and the other at the same time :))) it's a bit ambitious and risky to write two stories at the same time - and confusing too lol - but I think it'd be great for my motivation to work on both. XD  
> So yeah~~~ ANOTHER SOONCHEOL! I hope you'd like this one too~ chapters would be short! Around 500 words most probably. ^^  
> Guess what kind of genre this one is now ///u\\\\\\)
> 
> See you soon! <3


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